I think I need to go and see the most reverend Reverend and unload in the Confession Booth. You see, I have a deep, dark secret. Like anyone else with an IQ higher than a tomato, I have spent huge amounts of my time pointing and laughing at Fast And Furious movies, anyone who is a fan, and the entire subculture around it. The casual disregard for physics, the computers that can do anything, the plot holes that are simply glossed over, the fambly, the Rock kicking a torpedo… on ice!
Realizing I had not seen a second of these movies since the aforementioned torpedo kicking, and as they are still bafflingly popular and we do have a movie website here, I sat down to watch Fast 9 and Fast X last week (while drinking heavily) and, well…
OK, they are objectively awful. Stupid, ridiculous, laughable. They are, by any measure, a load of comical horseshit. And yet, and yet… I was not bored once. I was completely entertained from beginning to end, and when Fast X ended on a cliffhanger I immediately wanted to know what happens next. What will I do if anyone finds out about this? How will I be able to look my wife and kids in the eye, knowing this happened? Maybe it is best if we just forget this ever happened, right?
In the post-credits scene of Fast X it was revealed that Dwayne Johnson’s Luke Hobbs will be returning. Now a listing in Production Weekly has revealed that he will lead another spin-off and it will be titled Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Reyes. This follows the last spin-off, which was titled Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw. This movie will bridge the gap between Fast X and Fast X: Part Two.
The title suggests the movie will center on Jason Momoa’s villain Dante Reyes. Fast X: Part Two is set for an April 4th 2025 release, so this movie must be in some kind of pre-production right now and will have to start shooting before the end of the summer to get out the gate before that main movie.
Previously, the Fast And Furious franchise was a sure-fire money-earning juggernaut. As part of the same performance uncertainty that has hit Pixar and DC recently, and even pulled down Marvel, the series has stuttered. Furious 7 made $1.5 billion of a $250 million budget. Movie number eight made $1.2 billion. F9 was delayed by COVID and was impacted by cinema closures, then was released in overseas territories first, allowing for increased piracy. That was the excuse, anyway, as to why it only made $726 million.
Although that excuse may now be laid bare, as Fast X cost $340 million but has made only $679 million worldwide. The wheels are coming off another mega-franchise?
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