Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. This is what we shall tackle today. Either way, you mofos are sinning like the filth mongers you have always been, and this place positively reeks of it again. Your foul sinning defiles our near-heavenly Outpost, so once again it falls to me, the most reverend Reverend, to cleanse your souls and our very home.
This reminds me of the time I was running that sex-trafficking hub in Calcutta spreading the good word among the heathens of the dark continent. The veritable hum of sin corrupted my nostrils there, as well. Frankly, you should all be ashamed.
But fear not. There is one who can absolve your sins, should you wish to partake in confession. She is ready to feast on your rising naughtiness until your wickedness is drained, and your evil is spent. Hark, for the Goddess Gal Gadot will enter your hearts and your souls. She appears hungry. Or possibly sleepy, it is hard to tell sometimes. Are you ready to spread the booth wide open and unload your sin?
Today’s Confession centers on your filthy, sordid little power fantasies. The things you think about when you think nobody else is watching. The way YOU would be running things if YOU were in charge of movies and TV and streaming. Imagine that Tinseltown secedes from the Union, like Texas after Biden pushes their border too far open:
You are now President of Hollywood, what are your Executive Orders?
Were I tempted by such powers, and not a pure man of the cloth, I might make it illegal to remake any movie that has scored over 80% on Rotten Tomatoes, therefore meaning remakes become a force for good, to improve bad movies, rather than a destructive poser, corrupting good movies. Remake Jaws The Revenge if you like, but try and touch the original, and the death penalty will surely beckon. Probably using that really cruel and unusual new method that has been in the news.
What would you do? You must confess. CONFESS!
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