Life is like a hurricane,
Here in Butthole,
Retards, memes, and our hobo’s insane,
It’s where the Mods don’t roll,
Might solve a conspiracy,
Or rewrite Goblin history…
Butthole Town, a fine community. From the rolling hills of Sydney Sweeney, across the Golden River, all the way to the Downvote Distillery, it is home to many, many fine establishments. Some we have visited already. Many we have yet to visit. If you are a tourist here, then please make full use of this complimentary map from Pops Tours™ to get your bearings.
As you look around, your gaze may settle on a giant structure on the hill overlooking Butthole Heights. A monolith? Some kind of fortress?
Ask your tour guide, Pops, about it, and here’s what the ol’ fella will tell ya.
The old money families of Butthole, the landed gentry, consider it an eyesore. A “New money” annoyance just like his questionable Ghost themed mural painted on the front of his manor house, or his replica of Snowman’s 1974 Kenworth tractor trailer in which he barrels through the backroads of Sydney Sweeney Hills on what he claims are “beer runs”.
This is the towering edifice that is Manimal’s Maximum Security Toy Vault.
If you stand downwind on a warm day, you may catch the faint, reassuring tang of mahogany and leather-bound books drifting across the town.
This means the vault has been opened for a new treasure to be placed inside.
An original G1 Transformer? A life size, latex Starship Troopers Brain Bug? Or has he simply been polishing his USS Flagg again?
You will never know, as it is not open to the public. Many have tried to enter, all have failed. Such is the sophistication of the security system.
The glistening curios within are only for the private enjoyment of one man.
D-D-D-Danger, look behind you,
If you’re Joop-ish Ray will find you…
