I just got back from watching Disney’s Predator: Badlands with my best friend and hetero life partner, Trog. Trog hated it with a passion. I thought it was okay for what it was.
As we discussed the reasons why, I realised that our enjoyment of the movie depended less on the totting up of the movie’s positives and negatives, but whether we could divorce it from all that has come before.
I’ll keep things brief and won’t spoil anything. Not that you care.
Yautja
The extent to which you enjoy Predator: Badlands will depend on your ability to compartmentalise. This ain’t your grandaddy’s Predator, that’s for sure. It’s so far removed from the 1987 original that it’s pointless pretending it is part of the same Universe.
Oh, I know that Disney will try to mush it all together. I guarantee they’ll bring Arnold back to voice Dutch in the animated follow-up to Predator: Killer of Killers, and you can take that to the bank.
But in reality, this is a young adult take on the same creature, based on the comics I reckon. I don’t read them, but it’s got that whiff about it. Weird and outlandish. I don’t know what kind of shit comic book writers smoke, but I’d love to try it.
Comics tend to skew young, plus it’s Disney, so it should be no surprise to hear that Disney’s Predator: Badlands features cutesy CGI animal sidekicks, a ‘found family’ message and a pair of robot legs that do karate.
To be fair, the robot legs belong to Elle Fanning, and the ass is included, so it’s not all bad. Can I get a pair to go?
The Predators aren’t even called Predators but ‘Yautja’ (pronounced ‘yowtcha’),’ which is the sound you make when you place your hand on a hot stove.
I just looked it up and ‘Yautja’ was coined by Steve Perry in his 1994 novelisation of the original Alien vs Predator comic series. Was anyone gatekeeping this shit back then, or could he just make it up unilaterally?
Legacy fans
Anyway, the term ‘Yautja’ didn’t appear in the movies until Predator: Killer of Killers, which was released earlier this year. I consider that the starting point for this new Predator Yautja Universe. If you can do that too, then you might be able to enjoy Predator: Badlands as a fun, undemanding couple of hours.
If you can’t do that, you will find yourself getting angry at how different this is. You can’t reconcile the unreconcilable, so let it go. Compartmentalise. Don’t think about the originals. That way lies madness.
Wrenage’s review was pretty accurate. Predator: Badlands isn’t a bad movie. It just wasn’t made for us: the ‘legacy fans.’ Who it was made for remains a mystery.
If you can compartmentalise.
If you can’t.
