Longlegs is not a biopic about Brigitte Nielsen. It’s a 2024 horror movie that has Nicolas Cage in it.
The amount of Cage in Longlegs is similar to the amount of Cage in Renfield. Renfield was sold as a Nicolas Cage Dracula movie, but it was a bait-and-switch. Renfield was actually an Awkafina movie with only a smattering of Cage.
Longlegs is similar. It is light on Cage. Unlike Renfield, that is okay, because Longlegs is odd enough on its own merits without him. Here is a mostly spoiler-free review.
Longlegs Time, No See
Longlegs is written and directed by Ozgood Perkins. He is the son of the late, great Anthony Perkins. Ozgood took an interesting career path. He started out as an actor more than forty years ago. His first credit is Psycho II, which defied all odds to be a decent sequel to a classic.
Perkins then appeared in movies like Wolf, Legally Bond, Not Another Teen Movie, Star Trek 2009 and Nope. Perkins started directing in 2015 with The Blackcoat’s Daughter. He already has another film slated for 2025, The Monkey, which is based on the Stephen King short story.
Perkins’s direction in Longlegs is nothing earth-shattering. At times it gives the feel of low-rent Cohen Brothers in the way it captures a time when wood-paneling reined supreme. Occasionally, a bit of flair is shown, like when images are projected in the old Kodak slide format. Sometimes it is far too dark.
As for his writing, Perkins displays a unique voice with Longlegs. The story has multiple layers. One could go so far as to say Longlegs is not a story in the traditional sense. It is more of a dark fairy tale. It has an aspect to it that is perhaps warped Disney crossed with watered-down Clive Barker.
Ultimately, Longlegs is a difficult movie to nail down. That is a strength and weakness.
All Night Longlegs
Maika Monroe is the star of Longlegs. Most will recognize Monroe from It Follows, which is getting a sequel, They Follow, coming soon.
Monroe portrays an FBI agent in Longlegs with a unique gift. Monroe is no Jodie Foster as Clarice Starling, however. Her character came from the FBI Autistic Division. Monroe is effective in creating a character that is capable of great insight but barely functional socially.
Joining Monroe is a couple of actors from yesteryear.
Blair Underwood hit the ground running with Just Cause in 1995, sharing the screen with Sean Connery. Underwood hasn’t really hit those heights since. It looks like he hasn’t aged a day, though. Underwood is Monroe’s partner, or maybe jockey, is a better word. He steers her where she needs to go to help him solve a series of murders that go back decades.
The other co-star is Alicia Witt. Witt goes all the way back to David Lynch’s Dune. Last time I thought of her was when she was in the running to play Mary Jane in Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man. Witt portrays the mother of Monroe’s character in Longlegs, a haunted woman with issues of her own.
With all these actors from better days being thrown around, is Longlegs a throwback to a better time. That is the real question, isn’t it? We will get to that later. For now, a few words about the main attraction…
Daddy Longlegs
Nicolas Cage is unrecognizable in makeup in Longlegs. His makeup is an odd choice. It gives him an androgenous look. Or, another way to put it, he looks like the singer from The Goo Goo Dolls.
As stated earlier, Cage does not get a lot of screentime in Longlegs. But rest assured, when Cage is on camera, he is going full Cage. He hits a weirdo level he has not hit in some time. Then again, I no longer treat Cage movies as must-see movies. Maybe I have missed such performances.
I am hesitant to give any details about Cage, the characters or the story because I went into this movie nearly completely blind. If I had known more, I would have had expectations. As things went, I was able to go with the flow. It was an interesting ride, intriguing, unnerving and confounding at the same time.
If people really want spoilers, they can go to Wikipedia. There will likely be numerous articles dissecting Longlegs. Initial reviews simply aren’t the place to do it.
The Longlegs and The Short Of It
Is Longlegs good? Unknown. Is Longlegs smart? Not sure. Is Longlegs deliberately odd, so as to confuse people into thinking it is clever? Possibly.
Longlegs is frustrating on more than a few levels. One intriguing element about Monroe’s character is introduced, used effectively and then discarded completely.
Likewise, the villain clearly has a plan, but what exactly is he accomplishing? Vague allusions are made, but I would be hard-pressed to actually spell it out.
Other elements feel like they are present to create an aura of complicated mystery for no other reason than to make the viewer feel like they are watching a complicated mystery.
And yet, Longlegs has a definite intriguing tone. It has a certain grindhouse quality to it that gives it personality. There are obvious metaphors and symbolism happening. The performances are good across the board, and Cage gives us what we want from him.
Ultimately, Longlegs is the kind of movie you sit down and talk about with movie fans to figure these things out. It’s not really a movie to review. It is maybe similar to something like Infinity Pool. A person will either get into the weird or they won’t.
So Longlegs
At the beginning of the review, a joke was made that Longlegs was not a Brigette Neilsen biopic. Maybe it’s a Nicolas Cage biopic. That makes it truly scary.
That is also a joke. Or is it…? That is as good a way as any to boil Longlegs down into singular concept. Call it 3.5 stars for now and let time sort it out.
