Last week, the stench of your sins reached such epic proportions that, eyes watering and overcome, Boba Phil had to step in and give you all release. He has still not recovered. Fear not, for I, the most reverend Reverend, have returned from acting as padre for a team of new Venezuelan property managers in Aurora, Colorado raising much-needed funds for a new church roof and now we can get some real sin dealt with around here. Stand by, forgiveness is at hand.
Whose hand? The hand of the Goddess Gal Gadot stands ready to grip your sin firmly, and pull until the sin flows from you. You certainly have a lot of sin to give. I have seen you all, down there in the Disqus, with your sinful memes and your wicked disdain for Hollywood. Hark, for she approacheth!
The subject for this confession comes from an Outposter. Last week, upon a viewing of Twisters, it was declared satisfactorily adequate in every way. In this discussion, the Outposter KevinShieldsDisney+Reboot challenged if anyone could remember the last time we didn’t just accept the adequate in our cinema viewing. Your confession is:
When was the last time you were truly blown away by your film experience in a movie theater?
Was it that finale of Avengers: Infinity War? Has it really been more than half a decade since a movie had the power to do that to us? Or has it been even longer? Is this why you are so angry? Is this was leads you all to sin so hard and then, ten minutes later when you have got your breath back, to sin again all over yourselves?
The lack of cinematic fulfillment is truly the path to sin? As a man of the cloth, I must investigate this, and you must confess. CONFESS!