My missionary work has taken me far and wide across the world. Recently, I have found myself as far afield as Somalia collecting my commission from weapons funding for pirates overseeing a vaccination programme for the less fortunate. Wherever this noble line of work takes me, returning to my parish at the Last Movie Outpost is always a pleasure. After all, home is where your porn collection flock is.
However, I do see that while I have been away administering to the wretched, your sacks have grown heavy with sin. So once again it falls to me, the most reverend Reverend, to arrange for a release.
This means that it is time to spread the Last Movie Outpost Confession Booth wide open once again. Afterall, all that sin has to go somewhere, and hark for she doth approach…eth. I don’t know about you, but I think the Goddess Gal Gadot looks ready for action. Maybe she has been running?
You must surrender your soul, and unburden yourself of your heinous shame. While I watch.
Today’s confession will burrow deep into your psyche to unlock those painful movie going memories.
No matter how many movies you see, how much flickering myth rotates through both your conscious and your subconscious, some scenes effectively tattoo themselves into your frontal lobes for immediate, and not always welcome recall. Sometimes this recall is triggered by real events. What do we mean?
Examine Final Destination 2. A fairly innocuous movie. A sequel to a horror movie from around the turn of the millennium when such movies were a dime a dozen. The franchise would eventually spawn countless sequels, leading to many conversations that started “Is that the one where….?”
Yet there is one scene that I simply cannot expunge from my memory. Not only that, but the entire scene comes smashing straight out of my memories and replays right in front of me every single damn time I am driving down any road, anywhere, and I find myself in the vicinity of any truck carrying any kind of questionable load.
You all know exactly the scene I am talking about:
Every. Damn. Time. I just have to get around it and put as much distance between me and the truck as possible before the grisly deaths start to happen.
So now it is your turn.
Which movie scenes are seared into your brain, ingrained into your psyche, and come flashing back at the most inopportune moments?
Unburden yourself. Cleanse your soul. Relieve your conscience. You must confess. CONFESS!
