Butthole Town has had it’s fair share of interesting historical characters over the years. Who can forget Stub, the patron of our very own Palace of Fine Arts? Or legendary enjoyer of his own company, Razzbender.
Speaking of enjoying your own company, it is perhaps time to leave the digital wonders of dong removal behind and marvel at Butthole Town’s premiere medical facility.
Darth Busey was a class leading resident who, somehow, managed to miss all the notable events in the history of the town.
He was absent from the Solo Roundtable. Nowhere to be seen at the invasion of the Gay Puppet Hordes, and could not be found as The Man Who Saved Movies failed to save any movies. Why? Because he stayed at home and jacked off all over himself.
A legendary practitioner of the art of onanism, endlessly capable of handing himself to paradise. His masturbatory prowess was as legendary as it was tissue-intensive.
He was voted winner of the Least Flexible Socks competition for five years running, so it was a curious affair when, one day, he simply disappeared.
He did not completely abandon us. Through a generous trust that he bequeathed to the town, we established The Darth Busey Memorial Wankatorium.
Are you afflicted by the inability to self-pleasure? Are you too picky when browsing the internet for items of gentleman’s interest? Fear not! A short stay* at The Darth Busey Memorial Wankatorium and you will be pulling your own tummy off in no time.
While here, why not talk to one of our in-house auditors and sign up to stay even longer in our palmists paradise retreat.
Here, with just a small contribution increasing up to 50% of your gross income, you can learn every technique you could ever need to reach stroking enlightenment. Choke the chicken, skin the tiger, and discipline that unruly monkey multiple times a day.
After many years of dedication, you could reach Operating Busey Level 7, and then your wife could disappear with no questions asked, too.
*May cause mild headache, nausea, or dizziness in some individuals. Consult your doctor if you experience severe or persistent symptoms. The Wankatorium cannot be held liable for the discovery of browser history, tissue bills, loss of vision, or increased hairiness of palms.