Abominable (2006) is a poorly named Bigfoot movie. Bigfeet aren’t “abominable.” Yetis are “abominable.” Come on, guys. This is standard sasquatch nomenclature.
They are two different species. Bigfeet inhabit North America. Yetis live in the Himalayan mountains.
This is like making a Lake Champlain Monster movie and calling it “Nessie.” I’m so upset I’m inclined to not even watch your movie. I’m more inclined to protest Red Circle Productions in a “mostly peaceful” way that includes hardly any fires.
But I will abstain for now because that requires physical exertion. Instead, let’s take a look at your poorly named movie and see if the end product rises above such mistakes.
Abominable
The plot of Abominable is thus:
A paraplegic widower moves back into his remote cabin and quickly realizes a sadistic sasquatch is stalking the gleefully bad actresses next door.
Abominable is directed by Ryan Schifrin. He worked on Rush Hour 3…in the music department. Good on Schifrin. That kind of climbing of the corporate ladder shows some moxie. He found his way into the director’s chair by hook or by crook.
(Editor note: Stark pointed out Schifrin is also the son of famous composer Lalo Schifrin.)
Schifrin pitched Abominable as a Rear Window creature feature. That’s not a bad idea for a mash-up, and it makes one wonder how Hitchcock would have done it — probably a bit creepily toward whatever blond actress he put in the lead role.
How does Schifrin do it? He’s no auteur, but effort is displayed. Schifrin attempts to squeeze suspense out of the concept, but only so many options exist when the main character is confined to a wheelchair.
The suspense comes across as forced when the main character is shown to desperately…roll his wheelchair toward a door…or send an email…fastly.
Maybe Schifrin thought the music he put over such actions would make it work due to his experience in the music department of Rush Hour 3.
Narrator: the music did not make it work better.
On the other hand, Schifrin gets in some good setups here and there. For example, the first shot of the bigfoot shown in silhouette is beautifully done.
Schifrin also wrote the story, along with James Morrison. Theoretically, the story hits the proper beats. Get characters to location. Inject monster. Remove characters one by one. Throw in some stymied attempts to get help. Confrontation.
Abominable Casting
Matt McCoy plays the main character. Viewers will recognize McCoy as Lloyd Braun from Seinfeld. McCoy shows up, hits his marks and delivers a solid performance. I certainly believed he was a guy with a bigfoot outside his house.
Yet, I often found myself focusing on the wrinkles along McCoy’s ears. Schifrin displayed a habit of using a lot of big close-ups. Maybe whatever cabin Schifrin borrowed from an uncle’s friend to shoot Abominable in had décor he wasn’t allowed to touch, so he had to work around it.
Regardless, this kept bringing McCoy’s possible facelift to attention.
The girls next door are played by Haley Joel (As The World Turns once), Karin Anna Cheung (Better Luck Tomorrow), Natalie Compagno (The Young and the Restless twice) and Tiffany Shepis (Tromeo and Juliet).
This foursome is…pretty. As they succumb to bigfoot attacks, they respond with all the prettiness they can muster and are fully believable as pretty. I never once doubted the prettiness of any of these characters. When the going got tough, they got pretty. When the time came to emote, they were pretty. They also screamed a couple of times. Prettily.
In all fairness, the screenplay did not require much else, and they are kind of hung out to dry the way some of the scenes are staged. For example, if two girls are talking, and the other two are simply stuck in the background, what are they supposed to do beyond shrug and twitch with agitation of the situation?
Finally, Christien Tinsley plays McCoy’s douchebag nurse. He clearly had fun playing up the jerkiness of the character. Tinsley did double duty on Abominable. He also did the creature effects, which we will look at later.
More Abominable Casting
It should also be noted that a number of character actors show up in Abominable. These include Jeffrey Combs, Lance Henriksen, Rex Linn, Dee Wallace, Paul Gleason and Phil Morris.
None of them have huge roles, but Schifrin must have something on each of them to get them to appear in his movie. Or had a famous Dad.
Said something doesn’t have to necessarily be blackmail dirt. Maybe Schifrin has a child that goes to the same dance academy as the children of these other performers.
Who knows, but they are in the movie.
Finally, Michael Deak plays the bigfoot. He’s been in a lot of films. He even played a zombie in Romero’s Day of the Dead.
The creature suit for Abominable is one of its highlights. The suit is quite well done, especially when it is shot and lit right. The body is very much King Kong 1976, but the face is unique. It is not ape nor human. Its teeth are excessively long and thin. It has good articulation and glowing eyes that are used to nice effect.
The special effects are decent, as well. The death of Tinsley’s character is especially gruesome and shows what the creature’s oversized teeth can do to a person.
Abominable
Overall, Abominable is very much like one of the many cheap creature features that poured out in the early 2000s, but it punches a bit above its weight. Schifrin may not be an A-lister, but he had the sense to put a spin on the standard plot by smashing it together with Rear Window like a kid crashing Matchbox cars into each other.
The main performers are also not A-listers, but they at least have fun with it as they ditty-bop through the familiar beats of what is basically the slasher formula. Throw in some cameos by well-known character actors and a good monster costume, and you’re halfway there.
Abominable does not live up to its namesake as a description of the film. It’s nothing you would feature on a movie night for normies, but as something to flip on and unwind with after a long day, it can fill the footsteps of a bigfoot track.
Abominable is tolerable.
